If I was superstitious, I would say I jinxed it. I did all that bragging about how much energy I had and how clean I made my garage, and then poof! It happened. All gone in a flash. One phone call puts me right back in the dumps--down goes roller coaster! The anxiety I feel anticipating CT scan results is well-deserved: it sucks!!
Got some disappointing news yesterday: I have to have more lymph node biopsies. I have mentioned before how I loathe needle biopsy of a lymph node. Painful. Invasive. I have had two before, and I was seriously hoping to avoid going through it again.
Last week when I visited my family doc to update her on my news from Toronto and treatment etc, I promised her that I wouldn't freak out about the CT reports like I did in February when I saw the reports after my January scans. That scan showed some enlarged nodes in my neck, and I recall being vaguely puzzled about that as I was under the impression that I didn't have any lymph nodes left IN my neck!?
After phone calling and emailing my panic to several of my medical professionals, I was assured that the nodes were enlarged likely due to the thyroid surgery I had just had at the beginning of December, not even a full two months before the scan. The nodes were at still an acceptable level of enlarged-ness (?) so we should not worry. Technically, it was a clear scan, my first one without bad news on it.
Good thing I didn't get too used to that feeling, as the nodes are further enlarged now, and we are almost five months post-surgery. My family doctor said she spoke with my endocrinologist yesterday morning, and they are going to speak with the head and neck surgeon to arrange a CT/ultrasound guided biopsy of the enlarged nodes on either side of my neck. BOTH sides AGH! :-( And I can't even be put under for the procedure, I can load up on sedatives, but I must remain awake.
They are still thinking that these lymph nodes are "reactionary" - I think that is the word she used? - to surgery and adjusting to altered lymph fluid flow, but they need to do a fine-needle aspiration biopsy to "make sure." It could be thyroid-cancer related, or a lesser possibility, melanoma-related.
Quite unlikely that the melanoma "skipped" up to the neck, without metastasizing to organ(s) in between. Abdominal scan shows no evidence of disease, that got the all-clear again this time, which is good.
Now I am just waiting for the call to go for the biopsies, will update upcoming appointments ASAP.
Update: OUCH . BOO . WAAAAHHHHHH
I'm not alone:
Obviously you share my pain, A Melanome Journey xoxo